Gilmore Girls: 5 Times Lane Was The Ultimate Best Friend (& 5 Ways She Fell Short)


Lane Kim is the best friend everyone wished they had. She is kind, caring, and always there for Rory. Lane and Rory are friendship goals, and it doesn’t take much for viewers to see that Lane does most of the heavy lifting in their relationship. Through the 7 seasons and revival, Lane is a steady presence in the lives of the Gilmore Girls.

These childhood friends don’t outlive their friendship. It is a beautiful portrayal of non-competitive, non-judgmental female friendships on television. For all these reasons and more, while Lane does fall short in some ways, Lane is still the ultimate best friend a girl could ask for.

10 HIT: Gives Rory A Place To Stay When She Leaves Her Grandparents’ House

Rory has a big fight with her Grandparents and Logan and she decides to crash with Lane. Lane couldn’t be nicer about it. She’s welcoming and kind to Rory, and isn’t pushy or demanding to know what went down. Lane lets her stay at her place despite Zach’s complaints about her having “moved in.” Lane is even ready with coffee and makes breakfast for Rory before Rory sets out to right all her wrongs. Lane provides stability and extends solidarity to Rory who is in dire need of it at that moment.

9 MISS: She Crashes At Yale For Too Long

Lane and Mrs. Kim have a falling out and Lane decides to crash with Rory at Yale. But with three people living together and one of them being Paris, Lane doesn’t realize that she is outstaying her welcome. Rory is not good at confrontations and doesn’t want to ask her to leave and so Lane follows her to her home when Rory goes back to Stars Hollow, and then back to Yale again with her. And when all of Rory’s roommates decide that Lane has stayed too long, Rory courteously asks her to crash with Lorelai.

8 HIT: Excited For Rory When Lorelai Isn’t

Rory’s first kiss was a big moment for her and Rory doesn’t feel up to sharing it with Lorelai yet. But instead, she shares it with Lane who is super excited for her. Viewers will find Lane’s excitement about a big moment in her friend’s life to be heartwarming for sure. Lane fully engages with Rory during this time, letting Rory savor her moment.

This is a very selfless gesture on Lane’s part and she earns many points in their friendship for this moment.

7 MISS: Is Lane A Better Friend To Lorelai Than Rory?

Lane is Rory’s best friend but as Rory gets embroiled in her own drama and Yale, they see less of each other. During this time, Lane and Lorelai become closer and appear to be more like friends than Lane and Rory do. Lane doesn’t figure into the picture when Rory has her breakdown of quitting Yale, and gets caught by the police, and moves into her grandparents’ house. Lane even mentions to Lorelai that Rory is living with her, when Rory eventually has to crash with Lane, which makes viewers question who she is closer to at this point.

6 HIT: Isn’t Judgmental About Rory Having Slept With Dean

Unlike Lorelai who flips out, Lane is not judgemental about Rory having slept with Dean. Lorelai can’t come to terms with the morality of the situation, Dean being someone who is married. But Lane, on the other hand, is able to understand Rory’s difficult position and stands with her instead of pointing out the obvious, as Lorelai does. In doing so, she allows Rory to understand her mistakes in her own time, instead of pushing her away. While Lorelai completely pushes Rory away because she strays away from her usually right and proper ways, Lane allows her friend to make mistakes without punishing her severely for it.

5 MISS: Has A Breakdown When Rory Starts Spending More Time With Dean

Considering how new their relationship was, and how they barely had time to spend with each other, Lane could have cut Rory some slack. But Lane instead throws a tantrum and ends up spending the night at Lorelai’s, disturbing Lorelai’s date.

This is not one of Lane’s high points in their friendship. While it is understandable where her frustration comes from, how she acts on it seems a little too harsh on Rory. The eternal dilemma of boyfriend vs best friend withstanding, it is clear however that Rory would prioritize Lane over Dean in a heartbeat otherwise.

4 HIT: Stays Friends With Rory Even After She Gets Married

Lane Kim gets married to Zach pretty fast and pretty young. But unlike what pop culture tells us about how married people don’t have time for their friends, Lane always does. Lane is there for Rory even after she gets married, even after she has kids. It’s nice for viewers to see a friendship that survives boyfriends and husbands and kids. Lane lets Rory keep her stuff at her place and lets her house be a place where Rory can crash occasionally even after Lane and Zach are married.

3 MISS: She Is Heavily Dependent On Rory During Their School Years

Mrs. Kim is really strict and this forces Lane to be heavily dependent on Rory and Lorelai for mostly everything. She seems to take for granted their support for everything she needs and wants. Even though it is technically not her fault, their friendship hence seems very one-sided especially during the first couple of seasons. Lane gets Rory to buy her CDs, stores her things in their house when she goes to Korea, lets herself be fed by Lorelai, and even starts her band practice in Lorelai’s garage.

2 HIT: She Is A Pillar Of Support

No matter who comes and who goes, no matter the boyfriends, no matter the new friends that Rory makes, Lane is a pillar of constant support in Rory’s life. She is the ultimate best friend that Rory has. Lane is someone who seems like a part of Rory’s family.

She is a constant presence and her loyalty towards Rory never wavers. Lane is a concerned, caring, and kind friend who almost never fails Rory. And this is an amazing feat for viewers to witness on mainstream television.

1 MISS: She Never Calls Rory Out For Anything

While one of the major things about being someone’s best friend is to provide them with unwavering support, they are also responsible for calling out their friend when they do something stupid. Lane falters here. Lane never really voices her opinion on Rory’s life, even when Rory needs to be told by someone sensible that what she’s doing wrong. Lane is hence unable to completely fulfill her duty as a best friend since she’d rather avoid confrontation than tell Rory explicitly what she thinks Rory is doing is wrong.

NEXT: Gilmore Girls: 5 Ways It’s Still Relevant (& 5 Ways It’s Not)


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About The Author

vDevi is a twenty-something student from Kerala studying in Chennai, India pursuing her Masters in English Studies. She prefers writing because she’s no good at the talking business. She rewatches and re-reads things way too many times and has found a useful place to put all that info into now. You can also read some of her rants here:

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